52.

One True God?


‘One’ God – Three parts you see
Scattered on wind and earth and sea
Blindly seeing all choices made
Silently commanding their servants to pray

One saviour, dead and living still
Now honour his sweet sacrifice
Scream and flee from futile fakes
From torture, idol, and black death worship

Come to us, my children
We don’t worship icons of torture
We don’t eat flesh, drink blood
We don’t chant and sway in controlled rhythm

Hopelessly controlled in every ‘choice’
You cannot say we worship death
With rituals bled into bleeding stone
And priests who rape and steal and kill

No. We’re Christian.

51.

Untitled



The final leaf of winter
Tumbles from her bed
Torn by screaming doubt she wanders
Blown by vicious winds of hunters

Plummets softly as a stone
Gentle as a blade of steel
Swift to earth she makes her way
Full of dreams of better days

Strikes not ground but cold hard flesh
To lie immortal, swathed in blood
A memory fading soon to dust
And hope as fiery as Snow White’s crust

From pristine shirt the stain it spreads
And holds the suit-like shroud it dyes
To promise – never let my heart again
Lie wounded, broken, left unseen

Lips soft parted, poised for breath
Match blue eyes now turned to grey
Icicle eyes that pierce the mind
And leave the living far behind

50.

…ily



Have you heard my unsaid words?
The ones I’m scared to say.
And do you answer just the same?
Words silent as a thund’rous wind.
A wind of words to change the world
Three little words to say so much
Three simple words. So far. So near.
The causes of my nightly tear.

49.

icicle eyes


Icicle eyes that pierce me through
Icicle eyes. Clear, not blue
Cutting straight through my foggy head
Leading my thoughts (straight to bed).
Please spare my heart and look away
I’ve bled too much for you today...

48.

Colours


Green are the shadows
Purple is the night
Black are the desperate tears
Fleeing from Pink plight.
Amber is the soul that mourns
Scarlet is the heart
Golden are the hopeful dreams
Showing what we aren’t

47.

Undead


Try to sleep, nothing comes
No fast release, no dreamy charms
I close my eyes to escape the pain
But see you over. Here. Again
Haunting my life, and now my dreams

Over and over. Or so it seems

46.

Acid Pain




What do you do when you just want to die?
What do I say? What, Should I lie?
Should I say ‘I’m fine’ and hide my pain?
Should I turn my tears into acid rain?
There’s no hope for the blind un-dead
There’s no chance, ‘cos I never said
My dreams and hopes held deep inside
Shown only by the tears I cried
Silent tears of acid rain
Thunderous tears of acid pain.

45.

To an Emo Eye



What lovers lie
in your unloved eye?

What secrets hide
in your hidden eye?

The tears you cry
from your emo eye

They fall like rain
from a secret sky

44.

Dreaming Dead



I stand up tall on a slipp’ry slope
A mountain made of desperate hope
There! You’re standing right before me
Yet, as ever, you ignore me
I reach out, but you’re not there
There’s nothing there but smokey air
I stand there crying. My hope subsides
I’m left to store my pain inside
The nightmare now controls my mind
As hope is left so far behind
The mountain crumples down to nothing
Washed away by tears I’m crying
Another day. Another dream.
Never-ending. Or so it seems.

43.

Vengeance For My Suicide



My Scarlet Dove has fled the nest
Now I must track her down
I must avenge this brutal cruelty
That ripped her from my dying hand

My Scarlet Dove was all I had
She held my hand and gave me hope
I knew when it became too much
She’d rescue me, and set me free

But ‘kindly souls’ took ‘pity’ on me
And ripped her from my hand
They saved me from a ‘greater evil’
By condemning me to hell

Vengeance For My Scarlet Dove!
I vow on hope of death
Beware you stupid ‘kindly souls’
For ‘saving’ me, you’re dead.

42.

Lament


It’s a crying shame I cry for you
When I know I’ll ne’r be yours
When I know I’ll never hold you tight
And cry long on a starlight night

I want to –
NO! Resist the urge!
Ignorance is bliss, or so they say
Let him be happy, and never say

You never knew, you never will
The dreams I cry alone for you
The dreams that die as each new tear
Explodes against a cold stone floor

Will my red tears now do the same?
Will releasing them release the pain?
The pain of unrequited love
Burning in my Scarlet Dove

It’s a crying shame love causes pain
And you’ll cry for me. Too late, I fear. I’m gone.
I cried for you, for only you
I cried for you, now cry for me.

41.

Exam


The hand ticks slowly round the face
Shuddering to that final second
Dragging me closer, tick by tick
“Nearly time” I tell myself

The fingers round my pen are slick with sweat
A cold panic inside. I scream.
Drowned out by scratch of pen
No-one hears

“Time” is called
I close the paper, hand it in
I can only hope
The worry continues…

40.

Together / Alone


I sit once more where we once sat
So long ago. Together.

I order food as we once did
So long ago. Together.

I lie in bed like we once lay
So long ago. Together.

I remember how we spent those nights
So long ago. Together.

I hold the pain inside my heart
Right here and now. Forever.

I feel your words burn through my soul
Right here and now. I’m dying.

I sit and cry for the one I loved
So long ago. Alone.

39.

For Loving You


For loving you, I’m torn inside
A lie? The truth? I can’t decide
For loving you, I’m scarred for life
Just wanting it to be ‘all right’
Just longing you to share my life
We’re diff’rent, I know
Too diff’rent for love
I sit and dream…Forever…again

38.

Lethal Weapon


I feel my end is near, you know
A feeling inside, down below
Below my silent heart it lies
Hidden, Screaming, Loud it cries
Scolding me for lack of hope
Telling me that I can’t cope
The feeling grows, invades my mind
Nothing good is left behind
More and more melancholy,
I start to die. Slowly. Slowly.
First my heart, and then my mind
My little red tears aren’t far behind.

37.

I’m Sorry



I’ve a secret I never told you
I’ve a truth I always hid
I lied
I’m sorry

I’m not a perfect, model student
I’m not as good as you
I lied
I’m sorry

I’d like to tell you my heart’s desires
I’d like you as a friend
But I lied
And I’m sorry

I’m sorry for what I didn’t say
Like when I said “I’m fine”
I lied
I’m sorry

I said I’ll hand it in tomorrow, Miss
I said “I’ll see you later”
I lied
I’m sorry

I said I’d never slit my wrists
I said that’s in the past
I Lied.
I’m Sorry.

36.

Neverland


I’ll never reach my Neverland
I’m trapped for e’er in hell
This earthly hell of cold, dry tears
Of a lifeless existence
Of loving hatred

I’ve never said the things I dream
I’ve never laid bare my soul
My naked soul will perish with ease
In a freezing hell
Of murdering truthfulness

My dreams ARE my Neverland
I fly there every night
“Second star to the right”, they say
“Then straight on ‘till mourning”
-All happiness dies in my day

I want to go to Neverland
And never go away
I want to live out all my dreams
In my life, every day

But Neverland’s a dream-world place
And I know that in my heart
I can visit for a few short hours
And then it’s time to cry

I’ll meet my Neverland in the end
My last breath will speed me on
To Neverland, then and forever,
The beginning. The end.

35.

Palabras de Sangre


He’s just a lonely poet at heart
And his heart lies on the page
The words flow from his pen as blood
His wholesome being in every one

A never-ending stream of words
Floods out from his mind
For a thousand years, his red tears
Have scorched the frail white sheets

But now he’s bled his body dry
No more tears- he no longer cries
No longer cries in salty words
No longer screams in bitter verse

Nothing left to write about
Nothing to distract his mind
Alone he cried
Alone he dies

34.

Caller in the Night


I sat alone late last night
My knife poised o’er my wrist
No thoughts had I but suicide
No dreams save of eternal sleep

A ringing tone- the funeral march
Wakes me from my daze
An incoming call – a listed number
A lifeline to a wider life

We sat for half an age or more
Chatting the night away
Morning came, a darling flame
And severed our sightless sightline

So until next time,
Night or day
I say goodbye
And close my eyes

33.

Postcard

Life is so temporary
But I realise too late
Just how I need you
Your joking, your traits

All the thinks that make you you
-That made you you- now no longer
No longer a jibe at my new girlfriend
No longer a joke ‘bout how you want her

I’d give you her in a heartbeat now
If you could stay on earth
For a week, a day, a minute or less
I would grant you any wish

But you have died
And for weeks I’ve cried
So until we meet again my friend
C u l8r m8